What Your Book Crush Says About You

Well, here we are. A drippy, chilly, dark February Friday just like any other -- except that we have to watch our coworkers sniff at ponderous towers of roses and baby's breath that were delivered to their desks throughout the day, and every 30 seconds one of them shoves a gigantic box of chocolates under our noses while begging us to "take as many as you want, he just can't resist sending them but I really have to lose three pounds before the wedding next month." Okay, my coworkers aren't that bad, but I've seen plenty of romantic comedies about loveless career women, so I know the script.

As a veteran of some 22 single Valentine's Days (yes, I'm counting the one where I was 10 months old), I'm not ashamed to say I spent many a Valentine's Day with only a good book to keep me company. Most dates that were on offer (admittedly few) couldn't hold a candle to the rollicking good times I had with my favorite literary heroes. Mr. Darcy, Gilbert Blythe, Benedick -- these men set a high bar, what with their clever quips, swoon-inducing compliments, and limitless good looks. Plus, sorting through the various archetypes offered by the novels and plays I pored through allowed me to piece together the sort of guy with whom I might be happy on some dreamy, rose-tinted Valentine's Day far in the future. It was like a mental Pinterest of relationship planning -- read all the books, then hit up OkCupid for the perfect composite of all your favorites! (In real life he'll belong to a lot more fantasy sports leagues and spend somewhat less time roaming the open moors, but compromise is an essential part of relationships too.)

Many of us think of romantic heroes as being somewhat cookie-cutter in nature, but the world of fiction actually offers a dazzling variety of leading men from whom to choose. While certain figures, like the oft-mentioned Mr. Darcy, seem to have the market on literary crushdom cornered, there are a lot of desirable men filling the pages of classic literature -- and they all have something different to offer. Over the years, I've giggled with friends over various fictional studs, but, just as in real life, we often disagreed as to which romantic figure reigned supreme. In high school, I was Miss Sarcastic, and Mr. Darcy did seem like the ultimate -- a handsome foil for my sharp comments who would be won over by my spirit and sass. Other friends prized dark, brooding men, like Mr. Rochester, whose melancholy seemed to promise sensitivity, an artistic nature, or a painful secret (in this case the last, unfortunately, but they can't all be winners). Some women preferred carefree rogues who represented freedom and fun. And more often than not, our tastes in fictional men seemed to say far more about our true natures than we realized.

There's no accounting for taste, so I can hardly hope to cover all the possible options here -- but here are some telltale crushes that might reveal who you really are.

1. Gilbert Blythe from Anne of Green Gables: A sense of humor is important to you, and you want a partner who makes you feel as comfortable as your favorite old t-shirt does. When Anne was mooning over a dark, melancholy type, you were silently screaming at her for overlooking charming, companionable Gil, who always got her jokes. In your fantasy, you'll fall in love with your best friend, who also happens to be incredibly handsome, roguish, and wild about you, and the rest of your relationship will be smooth sailing. How could it not be?

2. Laurie from Little Women: You can't resist a healthy dose of charm, even if it means you have to compromise elsewhere. You're a good-time sorta girl and need a cute, charismatic guy at your side on the party circuit. He may not be the most hardworking or morally conscious dude in the world, but he's not a bad guy. And really, you're not too focused on saving the world or advancing your career either. Gotta save that energy for happy hours and club crawls.